My spouse had an affair. What do I do?

While many people have been surprised at the number of users whose information was released in the Ashley Madison attack, some experts are attributing the large number to the economy. When the economy is doing very well, people generally have more money left over after the bills are paid and the food is bought. This means there are more available funds that may be used for things like the paid subscription on the Ashley Madison site or to bankroll local, in-person affairs.

If the economy is suffering and a family is struggling financially, it can lead to a breakdown in communication in the couple and decreased martial satisfaction. Being fired or laid off can also hurt a spouse’s self-esteem and find them looking for validation in an inappropriate relationship.

No matter the reason, or lack thereof, behind a spouse’s infidelity, learning that your spouse has cheated on you is a huge emotional blow. While it’s very common to immediately consider a divorce, it’s important to make sure that any decisions made during this time are weighed out very carefully. Divorce can be a very long process, and it can seem difficult to stop or slow down once it begins.

If you are not quite sure about a divorce, separation may be an option. A legal separation allows the couple to set up separate residences and get court-ordered child support, custody and visitation as applicable. During this time, it’s important to get information from a neutral third-party who is not emotionally invested in your relationship, and this is where a lawyer can help.

Source: Global News, “Divorce expert ‘not surprised’ Calgary was Canada’s Ashley Madison capital,” Erika Tucker, Aug. 27, 2015

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